You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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