I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Text me some of your sweat
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