all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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