We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
