I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
We left the knife in your bed.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Randomize
