Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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