If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
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