Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Randomize
