I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I need a burrito and a hug.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
