He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
