she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
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