are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
