so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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