More tranny stories later!
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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