Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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