i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
