Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
