no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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