I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
