Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
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