I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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