I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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