Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Randomize
