It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Randomize
