that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
