Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
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