To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
