with your own penis?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize