You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
