Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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