she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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