It's Friday. Sex?
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Randomize
