how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
