I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
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