Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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