your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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