There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
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