Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Randomize
