I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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