Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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