I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Randomize
