I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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