Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize
