We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
