What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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