ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Randomize
