we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
