I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
