love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
