Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
